Shepherd, Shepherd
The heart of VIP is to help every part of the Body be its best. But to be honest, there exists a certain almost unfairness in the role of the leader.
To enter into a leadership role is to say, “Okay, hold me to a higher standard.” And this standard is iron clad and written in the Word whether any pastor, elder or team leader ever states it.
Time and again, be it Jesus, Paul or even the authors of the Old Testament, the Word advises that a position of authority comes with a personal price of self discipline, accountability and integrity that may be judged by humans but is most definitely judged by God.
(See 1 Timothy 3:1-10, Titus 1:6-9 or any of the law regarding the Levitical priests.)
This is sobering, really. American church, e-church and countless media outlets do a fantastic job of celebritizing the role of a church leader. In fact, the idea of difficulty associated with a title or position is often glossed over by the glamour of fame and potential of cash sales.
(Too dark? I digress.)
Leadership is rewarding.
Leadership is a lot of self sacrifice.
Sacrifice of time. Sacrifice of the right to defend. Sacrifice of the right to be right. And all solely for the greater good of the sheep.
And so I say it again. It’s not always fair.
Am I saying that the leader is not allowed to defend against false accusations or stand up for themselves when a miscommunication arises or when one is being victimized at the hands of a fellow believer? Absolutely not!
In fact, as we journey through the 10 VIP principles, we’ll talk about how to deal with these issues and more.
But what I am saying is that the leader does not get to deal with interpersonal difficulties in the Body the same way a “sheep” or church members they’re directly over may choose to.
When Jesus gives us the parable of the lost sheep in Matthew 18: 12-14 and Luke 15: 3-7, we get a model of the Father’s heart to His children and Jesus’ heart towards His brothers and sisters. All of the emphasis is on the shepherd. All of the energy to seek and find the lost sheep is on the shepherd and all of the focus in the reconciliation is upon the shepherd.
Never do you find the shepherd scolding the sheep for wandering. Nor do you see the shepherd requiring the sheep to jump through a bunch of hoops to return. It’s simply: “You were lost, relationship was broken. I have sought you out to restore the relationship and I am ecstatic that you have returned.”
(Ah, to be so gracious.)
But you KNOW a real shepherd had feelings that were deeper than this, uglier than this, more human than this. But the parable’s shepherd didn’t let those feelings spill over in such a way that they prevented the reason he became a shepherd in the first place— to care for sheep!
And as leaders this reality must be at the forefront of all of our dealings. Because sheep will roam. Sheep will walk off a cliff you warned them of. Sheep will bite back. Sheep will squirm away from the sheering. But sheep need their shepherd. And the shepherd’s allegiance must be to something much higher than his sheep’s response.
The allegiance must first be to the Lord’s call to love and serve those individuals which have been put in the shepherd’s care.
Is this too spiritual? Is this too hypothetical? Let me break it down for you in a personal example.
A disclaimer before I even begin this: I did not feel all of these things in an instant and it is still taking a daily crucifixion of the flesh to give myself an attitude check when I recall this instance—
Our worship team had worked their butts off to be ready for Easter service. We prepare with the philosophy, “Work out all the technical details during home practice, rehearsal and sound check and then during actual worship service just worship God free from any other concerns.”
And when I tell you, they worked, they worked and I was so proud. So when a team member crossed a line and affected the worship team’s ability to just sit back, worship and lead other’s into the presence of God, I knew I needed to step in and course correct in what I felt was a gentle and informal manner.
(After all, we had multiple services to carry out this day.)
Well, it doesn’t take a genius to draw conclusions that the corrective conversation did not go how I planned. In fact, it ended with tears, a door slammed and hurtful accusations.
And honestly, I was ticked. I felt betrayed. I felt misunderstood. I felt disrespected. I felt angry. And I wanted to say all of those things because they were absolutely true to me. I wanted to bite back because I felt I had been needlessly attacked.
Thankfully, cooler heads prevailed. I did my best to smooth over the situation; but I knew it wasn’t something that could be settled in the 3 minutes I’d allotted for the conversation so I just had to give it to the Lord and carry on with Easter service.
But driving home from those services was tough. The incident remained on my mind the whole afternoon as I replayed it over multiple times.
I decided to try and reach out for resolution and reconciliation but my phone call and text message went unanswered. Naturally, indignation continued to bubble.
When my efforts were eventually returned, apologies and tears spilled over the phone line with explanations that honestly had little to do with me. It seemed I simply bore the brunt of mis-directed frustrations. Wrong place, wrong time.
Of course, I accepted the apology and assured the party that I’d think nothing else of it.
(Admittedly easier said than done.)
There was still so much more I wanted to say. So much more defense I wanted to give. So many more reasons why they were wrong in the first place. And trust me, I had a lawyer’s brief case full of defense.
But the Lord constrained me. Holy Spirit spoke peace to me.
Why?
Because this person needed to be in the fold more than I needed to be right.
The Lord knows all hearts—my feelings and theirs. And you know what? He valued their presence in the pasture more than my ego’s need to be heard and understood.
Do I still bristle some when I think of this. Yes, but it’s less every day.
And this is VIP leadership: Seeing the big picture of God’s people, setting aside the need to be coddled and trusting that God will take care of everything for me if I simply choose to care for those He’s entrusted to me.
So yeah, it sucks. But it’s so worth it. Because His pleasure is worth it. In fact, it’s all we’re called to live for. God’s glory and Jesus’ sacrifice is all that matters at the end of it all.
Scripture References
'This is a trustworthy saying: “If someone aspires to be a church leader, he desires an honorable position.” So a church leader must be a man whose life is above reproach. He must be faithful to his wife. He must exercise self-control, live wisely, and have a good reputation. He must enjoy having guests in his home, and he must be able to teach. He must not be a heavy drinker or be violent. He must be gentle, not quarrelsome, and not love money. He must manage his own family well, having children who respect and obey him. For if a man cannot manage his own household, how can he take care of God’s church? A church leader must not be a new believer, because he might become proud, and the devil would cause him to fall. Also, people outside the church must speak well of him so that he will not be disgraced and fall into the devil’s trap. In the same way, deacons must be well respected and have integrity. They must not be heavy drinkers or dishonest with money. They must be committed to the mystery of the faith now revealed and must live with a clear conscience. Before they are appointed as deacons, let them be closely examined. If they pass the test, then let them serve as deacons.'
1 Timothy 3:1-10
https://my.bible.com/bible/116/1TI.3.1-10
'An elder must live a blameless life. He must be faithful to his wife, and his children must be believers who don’t have a reputation for being wild or rebellious. A church leader is a manager of God’s household, so he must live a blameless life. He must not be arrogant or quick-tempered; he must not be a heavy drinker, violent, or dishonest with money. Rather, he must enjoy having guests in his home, and he must love what is good. He must live wisely and be just. He must live a devout and disciplined life. He must have a strong belief in the trustworthy message he was taught; then he will be able to encourage others with wholesome teaching and show those who oppose it where they are wrong.'
Titus 1:6-9
https://my.bible.com/bible/116/TIT.1.6-9
'“If a man has a hundred sheep and one of them wanders away, what will he do? Won’t he leave the ninety-nine others on the hills and go out to search for the one that is lost? And if he finds it, I tell you the truth, he will rejoice over it more than over the ninety-nine that didn’t wander away! In the same way, it is not my heavenly Father’s will that even one of these little ones should perish.'
Matthew 18:12-14
https://my.bible.com/bible/116/MAT.18.12-14
'So Jesus told them this story: “If a man has a hundred sheep and one of them gets lost, what will he do? Won’t he leave the ninety-nine others in the wilderness and go to search for the one that is lost until he finds it? And when he has found it, he will joyfully carry it home on his shoulders. When he arrives, he will call together his friends and neighbors, saying, ‘Rejoice with me because I have found my lost sheep.’ In the same way, there is more joy in heaven over one lost sinner who repents and returns to God than over ninety-nine others who are righteous and haven’t strayed away!'
Luke 15:3-7